The Ruthless Page 13

  He doesn’t ease me into it, his hips just start to move and pound into me until I think I’m going to pass the fuck out. My pussy is still so sensitive, my clit throbbing, and after a few strokes he really does have me screaming out my release.

  My hands give way but he shifts his grip and guides my body down onto the bed, facedown with my chest pressed into the mattress by one of his palms. Once the weight of my body is supported by the bed the tremble in my legs turns into a full-blown shake, my entire body dissolving into a quivering mess. His hips don’t falter, not even a little, just grinding into me the entire time with the steady control of a fucking long-range sniper.

  His hand clamps down on the back of my neck, pushing my face into the bed and I come again with a strangled scream, the scarf doing very little to stifle the sound.

  Atticus comes with a groan, his fingers biting into my skin so hard I’m sure I’ll have fingerprints in the morning to try to explain to Aodhan.

  I lie there, gasping and desperately trying to breathe. He takes a minute to recover and then tugs at the scarf in my mouth, pulling it off and away from me. His hands are gentle as he brushes my hair away from my face, possessive as he slowly removes the rest of my clothes, and reverent as he lifts me up and into his arms.

  I’ve never felt so loved by him before.

  Chapter Fifteen

  I keep my eyes tightly closed.

  “You can open them now, Floss. I can’t believe you got through it all without breaking,” he says as he walks into the bathroom.

  I still don’t open my eyes, instead I listen as he runs a bath, fussing with everything while I’m still safely tucked in his arms. I still can’t wrap my head around this being Atticus, my Atticus, who I spent so long waiting for and hoping I’d someday make love to.

  That didn’t feel like making love.

  It felt better.

  When he climbs into the bath and sits down, settling me into his lap with my head resting on his chest, I finally open my eyes but only because I desperately want to see the markings on his chest that make him the Crow of Mounts Bay.

  It’s too intricate and gorgeous for a gang tattoo.

  The whorls and peaks of the lines hint at feathers without even really being feathers, and the entire design is in the shape of a crow. I run my fingers down the lines and follow it around, only stopping when I come to a scar on his left side.

  The skin is raised and white, definitely an old scar, but it’s long and wide enough to have been serious at the time.

  Someone stabbed him.

  “Stop it, Floss. I can feel you freaking out. I’m alive and it was a long time ago. The man who did it is dead so stop planning retribution.”

  I glance up, blinking in the bright light after having my eyes closed for so long, and he takes the opportunity to kiss me.

  I sigh, my hand cupping his strong jaw because I never want it to end.

  I tuck my face back into his chest. “Is it stupid that I feel hurt you never told me? I spent years calling you about every little thing and yet you were off building an empire, an entire life, and being stabbed without me ever guessing. I feel so… small.”

  He doesn’t attempt to defend himself or brush my feelings off. We just lie there together, and I think about all of the paths we could’ve been on instead of this one.

  Then he picks up the soap, lathering his hands up before running them over my body. “I’ve had to make a lot of hard choices, Floss. Most of them I think I got right. Some I’m sure I got wrong. Then there’s the things that I just know I did my best at the time. Keeping Senior busy with the buyers meant that he could play with you without ever involving you. That was all I cared about, just for as long as it took me to build something big enough to take him on and win. It took up too much of my time, but I also trusted Ash, and then Harley when we found him, to keep you safe. He can hate me all he likes, but I knew no matter what, Ash would guard you.”

  He grabs a washcloth and slowly, sensually, washes me off. It’s hard to concentrate completely, especially when his hand dips between my legs, but this moment is too important.

  This is the true beginning of the mending from all of the damage his chosen path has done to us.

  “The scar is from one of the buyers. Senior enjoyed picking out all sorts of men for me to face and this one was a psychopath just like your brother. He enjoyed knives and he came the closest to getting past me. He tried to gut me, but I killed him before he finished the job.”

  I swallow around the lump in my throat. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’ve cost you so much.”

  Atticus presses his lips to my forehead. “This is nothing. It’s not even close to what I would pay, give, steal, and slaughter to keep you safe.”

  I choke out a laugh, sitting up and away from him even as the water sloshes over the edge of the tub. “Why? Why would you do all of that? We were close as children but… how could you know that you’d still want me as an adult? Do you still want me or is this all just a sunk cost at this point?”

  He stares at me with a somber expression and his fingertips run down my spine. “You once broke Bing’s foot when we were kids, do you remember that? He flicked Ash’s wrist after Joey broke it because he enjoyed hurting people, and when you found out, you stomped on his foot with your riding boots on.”

  I cringe a little as I remember. My father had beaten Ash until he was choking on blood as my punishment because he knew nothing would hurt me more than Ash’s pain and suffering on my behalf. He also hoped it would drive a wedge between us, that Ash would resent me for getting him beaten so badly.

  Ash has never, not once, blamed me for our father’s many punishments.

  I would burn the entire city to the ground for him.

  “Then you had photos of Holden choking his high school girlfriend sent to the press, and my father had to pay out her family, because she was an heiress with mafia roots, so they couldn’t just kill her to cover it all up. My mother still has nightmares about the entire thing.”

  I giggle at that because it was some of my best work. I was just barely in middle school but Holden was an absolutely disgusting asshole of a man. Still is.

  “There is no being around you, Floss, without desperately wanting to keep you. Without falling in love with your savage, ruthless, perfectly poised self. I’ve never met anyone who knows their own mind like you do. You make a choice and then you follow it to the very bitter end, no matter the cost. You were mine from the very beginning.”

  I will not cry.

  I absolutely will not cry right now.

  He leans forward to catch my chin, drawing my lips into his as he kisses me, slow and deep. It tastes like every word of love and worship he’s given me tonight.

  His fingers slip back into my pussy again, his other hand curling into my hair gently and holding me still. “Come for me. I want to watch you this time.”

  His fingers work me over like an expert and his eyes are intense as he takes in my every shudder, gasp, and moan. I thought all of the tension in me had already melted away and that this would be less explosive, but when my eyes drift closed, his fist tightens and he growls at me in the same steely tone, “Eyes on mine. Don’t shut them, Floss.”

  I want to spend the rest of my life listening to these commands.

  I come with a groan, trying and failing to stop my eyes from rolling back in my head as I grind down onto his fingers.

  Atticus washes me all over again and then lifts me out of the bath as though I weigh nothing, drying me and carrying me back to bed. Once I’m tucked in safely, my eyelids heavy with sleep and every last thought in my brain has been banished by his commands, he stalks back over to his clothes and rummages around in his pockets for his phone.

  I drift off to sleep, startling awake again when his fingers thread through my hair and his lips press against mine.

  I try to blink away the sleep, but the room is dark and exhaustion is riding me hard.

  “Avery, I need to ge
t back to work. Something has come up, but I couldn’t leave without saying this. I would do anything for you… but I won’t share you. I’m not going to fall into your bed with another man, and I’m definitely not going to work out a sharing schedule of when you can be mine and when you belong to him. I can’t and I won’t.”

  And with that, the bubble of happiness and relief and joy bursts.

  “Fucking Atticus Crawford, I’m gonna come home and rip his fucking throat out.”

  I shudder, Lips’ words a little too close to home after Lucy’s performance in the first round of the Game. “How can I be angry at him though? It’s not like polyandry is socially acceptable, let alone a regular thing!”

  She huffs down the phone at me. “I’m not talking about that part. I’m talking about where he was totally fine getting his dick wet, but as soon as he got off, he’s running the fuck away again? I’ll gut him—”

  She stops abruptly then curses under her breath.

  Then I hear Blaise say, “I’m going to pretend I heard none of that, but you probably shouldn’t let me get fucked up around Ash for a bit.”

  Jesus H. Christ.

  “Mounty, tell him I’ll reach down his throat and rip his heart out if he says a fucking word to my brother about this.”

  Lips huffs at me but relays it to him verbatim before walking away, and I hear a door shut and lock. “We’re at some shitty fucking hotel in the middle of Texas. I hate it here, everything looks like it’s dirty, but there were no other options for the night. Ash is getting fucking blackout drunk with Harley because he’s… pissed about Colt.”

  Ah.

  The real reason I needed to call her this morning is because last night Lips met another one of her brothers, the Chaos Demon who’s desperate to save the little sister he barely met a decade ago.

  I like him.

  I’m not surprised Ash doesn’t.

  Brothers are a trigger for him.

  “So? Don’t leave me waiting here, Mounty, how did it go?” I say as I lean back on the couch and stare at Colt’s photo on the murder wall. After Atticus had left, I’d taken another shower, this one to wake me back up and clear my head. Okay, also to cry in, but that’s pathetic and not at all my style.

  Then, I made a mountain of coffee and came down here to work.

  “He was… fucking terrified of me. He hid it well, but when he realized I was his blood, he freaked the fuck out. I guess rumors of the Wolf’s exploits have made it to Texas. He… he was willing to pay anything to keep Poe safe, though, and I offered him whatever he needed. I told him I’d take on Grimm with him if it comes down to that.”

  I knew I was right about him. “So why is Ash upset about him? Did he say something or is it just his general panic about siblings?”

  She groans. “Just general panic. Colt was—he was a loving brother. Rough around the edges, sure, I mean, he’s a biker, but he really cares about her.”

  I nod even though she can’t see it. “He met with the Butcher to save her despite their bloody history. That can’t have been easy, and you don’t do that without really caring about your sister. Ash will get over it. You know he’s just overprotective.”

  She sighs, the squeaking of springs on the hotel bed in the background, and I wince. It must be freaking terrible there. “He’d probably be better about it if I hadn’t forced him not to come with me. I met Colt alone, and Harley just watched us with a sniper rifle because he’s a worrier.”

  I laugh at her, a proper roar of laughter that only she can get out of me after the day I’ve had. “How did you manage that? I literally can’t imagine Ash agreeing to leave you alone for anything.”

  She groans and says, hesitantly, “I threatened to fight them. Ash wasn’t prepared to get in the ring with me, and Harley had a little panic about hurting me. Blaise just insisted on me wearing a vest so that was easy enough.”

  I almost snort with laughter, because of course she did. Of course she found the only kryptonite those boys have and exploited it for her own means. Ash would never raise a hand to her, not even to practice or joke around, and Harley spends half his time trying to throw himself in front of her when there’s fists being thrown, so that’s an instant no.

  “I miss you so freaking much, Mounty. How many stops do you guys have left?” I mumble right as my security beeps, and I check on the tablet Jackson left me and see the Impala waiting for the front gates to open.

  I hit the button and unlock the front door with a few taps of the screen. It makes things easier and far more secure, but I’m sure Harley will be throwing the tablet at a wall in frustration the second he gets home.

  He hates this sort of thing.

  “Eight more stops and then I’ll be on the way home. I told Ash we should throw money at the driver to just go non-stop until we’re home. We could take it in turns. Fuck, I miss my orgy-sized bed and not listening to Finn sleep talk and a real goddamn shower. Oh my God, I miss showers, Aves. The one on the bus is like a fucking cupboard, fuck knows how Harley even fits in there.”

  I grin while she rambles on as Aodhan’s footsteps start down the stairs, a grin on his face as he sees the joy oozing out of me. I hear a door unlock and open down the line, signaling the end of our conversation while Lips has to entertain and babysit one of her many needy men.

  “I’ll leave you to it. Oh, and Mounty?”

  She hums under her breath, distracted at whichever guy has just wandered into her hotel room. I roll my eyes at Aodhan, but it has to be said.

  “You would’ve kicked his ass.”

  She cackles in evil joy. “Abso-fucking-lutely. I’d own his ass any day of the week.”

  I hang up, and Aodhan ducks down to kiss me, cupping my cheek gently. “The Coyote did a good job; this place is locked up tighter than a nun’s asshole.”

  I chuckle at him, and he sits down beside me, groaning and leaning back against the cushions like he’s carrying the weight of the whole world.

  I refuse to think about Atticus right now and how just a few hours ago, we were sitting here and feeling so close for the first time in years. He once again has made his choice, and it’s not me. Not really, because my heart is being torn in half right now and if I think about it again, I’ll end up on the couch with a pint of ice cream and a movie binge like some pathetic, weak little girl.

  Absolutely not.

  “Do you wanna talk about it? Whatever the hell has you sighing over there?” Aodhan murmurs, his palm curving around my thigh in a subtle, but clear comfort. He’s good at that, the quiet sort of supporting someone without smothering them.

  I refuse to live without him.

  “Not really. Not right now, anyway. Lips ranted about it enough that I’m angry again and not just fucking moping.”

  His eyebrows raise. “Cursing? Shit, I’ll watch my tone until you’re calm again so I don’t lose my dick while I’m sleeping.”

  I scoff at him, but it’s more of a laugh than anything. “Your dick is safe. I might go on a killing rampage later, but for the moment, I’m keeping my cool. I have too much work to do to lose my head now.”

  He nods and stares at the wall for a second before he stands back up and walks over to the MC side of it, lifting his hand and pointing at the Graves boys. “I see it now, you know. They looked familiar, but I just couldn’t fucking place it. They’re all Lips’ brothers. She’s Grimm Graves' daughter.”

  I clear my throat and step over to him. “Yes, but this is top secret. They—there are more siblings. Grimm doesn’t know about them, and we have to do everything in our power to protect them and keep them safe. Even knowing this much is dangerous for you, Aodhan. There are a lot of players in this.”

  He nods slowly. “You’re protecting kids, aren’t you? I saw your face when you saw the senator’s little ones; it was like you were adding them to a protection list.”

  I blow out a breath and nod. “It is. I can’t say anymore than that, but we’re working toward… well, we’re trying to get
Grimm taken out.”

  Aodhan nods slowly. “So that’s why the Wolf is in Texas? To kill him and get his kids clear of his sick games?”

  “It’s not as easy as that, unfortunately. The Chaos Demons and their spies mean that even if we take Grimm out, there’s potentially hundreds of sleeper cells in other MCs ready to take his place and take out the Graves heirs. We’re not worried about Colt or Chance, they’re grown and can handle themselves, but… the kids.”

  He curses under his breath and looks back at Blakeley’s photo. Kennedy and Carson are both grinning in the posed family photo. There’s no way of looking at it without seeing the little girl that Lips should have been. The happy, beautiful, loved little girl.

  “I have some contacts I can speak to. They’re Demons and dumb as shit, like bragging about shit to people. I’ve learned a lot in my time about MCs that way so I can see if they know any rats. It’s a start, right?”

  I lean forward to catch his lips with my own. “Thank you. It’s—it means a lot to me.”

  He presses his forehead to mine and murmurs, “Then it’s a priority for us both. Let’s fucking fix it.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  The excellent part of having the security upgraded to DEFCON-1 at my ranch is that I can get ready in my own bathroom with access to my complete wardrobe once again.

  The bad part is that it doubles my prep time.

  I try on at least eight outfits before I find something that hides the Kevlar without looking bulky or oversized. I slip a gun into my purse but leave the knives at home, confident that I have enough backup for the night.

  Illi picks me up and drives us both down to the Game, his fingers tapping on the steering wheel like his skin is crawling.

  “Withdrawals?” I murmur, just a little smug.

  He shrugs. “That, and there’s something wrong about tonight. You don’t live in the Bay for as long as I have without being able to smell the bullshit from a mile away.”